Change My Heart, O God

You ever been fussed at. The person giving you the piece of their mind is really in the wrong and all you want to do is point that out in a kind voice...while holding them in a half-nelson.

The old Susanna would have done definitely administered the choke hold but would have never used the kind voice. I actually told someone today that I was sorry (?!) despite the fact that I didn't really do anything wrong. Soft words were heard instead of the truth.

But my purpose in telling you this is not to show how good I am but how good God is. As I thought back to this episode and my reaction I was really shocked to remember kind words coming from my mouth.


Reflecting on all this surprisingly comforted my heart as I see how God has done a work in my life, assuring me that I am His because the Susanna before Christ wouldn't have reacted in such a way.



Thank you Lord for showing me your work in my life even in hard situations and reminding a hurt heart that Your love is "underneath me, all around me".

Refreshergy. Happy Times. Lovin' Life.

I think I've finally figured out why I haven't blogged in a while. I've actually been kind of busy, which I didn't realize until I started going through my pics for just one month.

The month of May has been full of laugher, reminicing, happy tears, graduations, dancing, games, a mountain, fellowship, family, friends.











The graduation was the most exciting this year because a precious girl who I've known since birth (ahhhhhh! I'm so old!!!), graduated from high school. I couldn't believe how much I cried. She's beautiful, her heart is gracious, her personality delightful and her smile infectious. Congratulations Elizabeth!










Lanie had her dance recital--3rd year--and did great! She loves to dance and always has. She had two dances this year and successfully did both. I particularly loved when she went up to get her award and said into the microphone, "My name is Alayna and I'm 5. years. old." Adorable. I was in the balcony but I'm pretty sure she heard her Aunt Susanna cheering for her.










A few friends, my sister and I decided to go to Oak Mountain this year for Memorial Day which was beautiful! We first canoed a little as we waited for the rest of our company to meet up with us. When Joanna and I ventured out, our other friends had just arrived so we rowed over to see them. Unfortunately, we have super rowing skills and rowed right into a giant bush on the shore line. I attempted to row us backward. Joanna just laughed.

All this rain has really payed off because Peavine Falls were the biggest I've seen. We hiked (if you call it that...we barely got out of breath) down to the falls and played around the waterfall, found a salamander, took pictures and then walked down the creek a little ways to find a pool that was a little deeper. There was a God-made rock slide that went right into this pool which made the water all the more inviting. Joanna and her friend were the only ones that slid though. I'm chicken if the water's too cold.



Then we had a good time looking at God's creation and wondering how anyone could not see that this world has a Creator with a special design in mind.

We headed down to the beach at Oak Mountain lake which was packed with people. Once again...didn't get in the water...too cold...and I didn't want to get my hair wet.



We brought a volleyball and since there were 6 of us, we played a few games of 3-on-3. Little did we know but there was a family watching us, wanting to play. After about our 3rd game, an interesting character approached us asking if we wanted to play their family since they had six who wanted to play. We figured--hey, 6-on-6, that's a real volleyball game. We're in--little did we know how eccentric the family was. I'll refrain from commenting on the different personalities, but I will say that we had opportunity to witness.



Our few games of playing the "interesting" family brought a crowd and, according to the family member, the next group would play the winner. Us. So we played a group of teenage girls who cheated horribly and still lost. Then a group of Mexicans that were a lot of fun. Then, what I will call the melting pot of Oak Mountain...there were 4 gentlemen from India, 2 Mexicans and 2 from our "interesting" family.

I'm sad to say. They beat us. Our last game and we didn't win!!


But we had fun. And I fell. Which is just par for the course. How can sand cause a scrape on my leg that looks like rug burn?!











This trip to Oak Mountain was so refreshing though. I used to go up there all the time with my cousin but work and life has kept me so busy that I haven't been up there in years. It made me reflect on how busy I keep myself and how I need to stop and refresh the soul sometimes, remembering my Creator and remembering that my life is but a vapor. All this makes me thankful for the days I've had and the times of rest that come just when I need them.










We serve a loving God, don't we?

...and that was the month of April.

There've been a few fun things that went on since my last post. I'll see if I can catch you up.

1. Lanie turned 5!! She had a princess party and it was, thankfully, uneventful. By that, I mean no injuries. We usually have some kind of story about the birthday parties and I'm just glad this one went off nicely. Daniel kept his eyebrows, no children were almost suffocated in the moon walk because of adults trying to jump and no balloons were accidentally set free before the party even began.

2.I went to see the Gardners in Colorado!! I can't even begin to tell you how much I miss that family. I had a 10 year old flying buddy and ever since we've been back we've been planning our next trip out there. We might even decide to fly to England one time just for fun--it's just one of the places we both want to visit, so why not go together, right?
While we were out there we:
-played kickball (beating the boys 5-0 one time, and 10-0 the next time!!)
-ate a lot of good food (Marie is a great cook and I love, love, LOVE her pimento cheese spread!)
-went window shopping which turned into people watching. Colorado is quite liberal...and interesting.
-I got to ski!! I never made it off the bunny slope, but I don't care. I had a blast!
-saw the Rockies and they. are. breath-taking. The weird thing is, they're pretty rocky. Like, very little grass and trees.
-kissed Mary Morgan every day. That baby girl is just precious!

3. I got to see Wicked, musical!! It. was. amazing! I didn't think I would like it as much as I did, but now I can't wait to see it again. Then we found the outside stage door and waited for the cast to take pics and meet them. Very fun!

4. We just finished up ball season so we've spent a lot of nights at the ballfield. Josh's team did better this year. He played 3rd base or left field and we got to cheer really loud and embarass him like we always do.

And here are a few pics of my nieces and nephews. You know. The ones I always talk about. They are pretty cute, I think.

A Method To My Madness

I know my blog url address is a bit long and my title seems a bit odd so I thought I'd explain myself since I did actually put some thought into my choices. My reasons:


1. I like them. Do I need a better reason than that?


2. I see now that they spark conversation and I'm pretending that that was one my original reasons for choosing them.


3. When you suffer, whether with pain, loneliness, loss, emotional strain, depression (and I could go on with reasons to suffer)...you start to thinking. Sometimes you get to thinking about things you shouldn't.
When I have a bad day of hurting and I feel completely worn out, I wonder if God is even paying attention to me, if He even notices that I don't feel good. I know it's a silly thing to wonder, but in my flesh, I think it. Sadly, it usually occurs to me, after the fact, that God is there and He does care and He is paying attention. And that thought seems to come later, at church, or listening to my music long after my pity party has passed. So the url is a reminder for me and came from the last verse of the hymn Jesus I Am Resting, Resting...
"Ever lift Thy face upon me as I work and wait for thee;
Resting 'neath Thy smile, Lord Jesus, earth's dark shadows flee.
Brightness of my Father's glory, sunshine of my Father's face,
Keep me ever trusting, resting, fill me with Thy grace."

As I suffer, and as you suffer, we must, must remember that we are ever 'neath His smile; which is a wonderful thing to remember when our thoughts are of nothing good. And we should remember that "earth's dark shadows" do flee, though at the time we feel like they don't, or won't, or can't.

The title of my blog is another hymn that I'm not going to quote because of all the verses and I don't think I could pick just one verse. Abide With Me is the title of that hymn and once again it reminds me that there isn't a moment when He isn't near. If I ever feel He's far away it's because of my own thoughts, sins, emotions...not because He isn't actually near. I love the psalms, but there are some hymns that just speak my heart and speak to my heart in ways that I can't seem to put into words.




Those are my three reasons for my rather long url and odd blog title. Aren't you glad you know now?
Are you resting 'neath His smile?

A Few Days Of Refreshment

I was delighted to house/dog/pregnant kitty-sit for a few days for friends and pretty excited to have a little alone time. I guess I didn't realize how alone I would be because I had no internet!!!! I was forced to actually find something else to do with my time other than checking emails, facebooking, blogging, and so on.
But I found this time to be even more refreshing than I'd hoped. I would walk the dog down a quiet road with woods on each side, watching her bolt after a squirrel as if her life depended it. I could stop and reflect on lovely trees, blue skies with fluffy white clouds, crisp spring air and thoughts of the Creator Who made such things for me to enjoy.

I am so caught up in my busy life at work, the tired drive home in traffic, a quick bite to eat before I fall into bed with my computer, hoping to keep some access with the outside world through my laptop before I lose consciousness...that I've seem to forget to just stop and, for lack of better phrasing, smell the flowers.
To just stand, looking up at, breathing deeply with my mind full of the God who delights in me. Well. It's overwhelming at times.

And not just that. These dear friends have a library!

Be still, my beating heart! Oh books, come to momma. So many...and yet I chose just one.

The quiet, the solitude did wonders for my worn out mind and it makes me wonder why I don't visit my family more often in Va where I could sit and rest the mind, soul, spirit. I do believe a trip is in order. Soon.
And thank you, wonderful God, for giving me this time to think on You, reflect on Your goodness to me and repent of not thinking on You more.



Then to make my time visiting this home even better...the cat had her kittens!!!! Four fluffy, adorable kittens! She had two late in the evening and I waited up for another hour and a half thinking there would be more. When two seemed to be it, I went on to bed but when I woke the next morning there were two more! Two calicos (females) and one black with a little bit of white and a solid white one (both males). I just can't stop looking at them and it reminds of when my own cat of 17 years, who's been gone for almost a year now, who had two litters a year for many years. I miss having kittens around. I almost wish I had told the family that there were only three kittens and steal one away to love. I wonder if I could talk my mother into another cat.

*sigh* kittens...babies....they're just wonderful, aren't they?

As I waited on the family to return, sitting on the steps of their open library, staring at the blue sky, blooming trees, feeling the wind blowing, watching that precious dog look for dead animals to bring up to me....wait, what?!

*gag!*

*Remember the blue skies. Remember the blue skies...*

Ever Tried to Put A Trampoline Together?

My brother and his wife bought a trampoline for their kids on the day after Thanksgiving. I remember the date because I was there and, my sister and pregnant sister-in-law attempted to put in the back of a truck. By ourselves. It took a while. And it's been sitting in their garage ever since.


Maddie turned three on the 18th of February and we had her birthday party a few weekends after. For some reason, we decided to put that thing together. It seemed easy enough but when you get too many opinions together at one time it takes a LOT longer than it probably should have.

The first dilema was how to put the rods/bars in order. You would that "A" would go next to "B" and then comes "C". After discussion we all agreed that yes, that is the order they should go. But after we laid "C" down then what comes next? There was no "D", so the the debate began as to whether you would start back over with "A" or if you would place another "B" down and go backwards. Personally, I can't believe we even had the debate but it did last for approx. 20 minutes.

I also learned that no one wants to actually use a manual screwdriver. When you have a mechanic who uses power tools for a living, he is quick to share with you how much he does not like having twist a screwdriver. So the debate began again as to who would use the screwdriver...the one who uses one for a living (brother #1) or the one who was the owner of the screwdriver (brother #2).

*note...these "debates" were not held in a mean, arguementative manner but in the typical Vaughan way. We picked on the person mercilessly. So when brother #1 didn't want to use the manual screwdriver he just picked on brother #2 until he did it himself. And the onlookers laughed.

We, the onlookers, also took time to play a little basketball, making sure that the ball bounced towards those working....

...or read up on how to jump on a trampoline, including some fancy jumps. I particularly love the figurines.

Some would take a break and use the trampoline before it was in actual proper working order. Maybe they were just overly excited. They are definitely very good at pretending because they look authentic to me.

Once we got the frame together things seemed to move much faster. Brother #2 took charge of attaching the springs from the black jump-on part to the frame...because he was the owner...and we felt like we needed a break from all our supervising...and it's fun to watch people work.

Once we all had our first jump then we decided to be safe (as one should be) and put up the safety net. That took time too and the two oldest were volunteered into that thankless job.

But the end project was so nice. So fun. So fulfilling.

Who would have ever guessed that it would take 4 hours straight to put up a trampoline? Only the Vaughans.

I've Got A Friend Who Owns A Viper

That's right. A Dodge Viper.

One of the most beautiful sports cars I've ever driven.

Ok. Fine. It's the only sports car I've ever driven. I had intended on just riding in it and next thing I know I'm in the driver seat heading ever-so cautiously around the parking lot.

We drove down a residential area just so I could get a feel of the clutch and warm up the tires. (apparently the tires have to get warm or you'll fish-tale at faster speeds)

I could not believe the looks we got. I hadn't even pulled out on the road yet and people were driving by honking horns and rolling down their windows to yell, "nice car!".

I felt like such a liar! It wasn't my car but my pet peeve of proper car etiquette required a smile, nod and thank-you wave. I suppose, just out of politeness I must pretend it's mine. Right?
At one point a young boy was running off his porch towards "our" car asking for a ride!

I just don't understand boys and cars. My friend, who is a fellow female, and I appreciate the beauty of the outside of the car and the fact that its black (which is very slimming) but it doesn't go much deeper than that.

We headed out towards the interstate since our tires were warm, my friend driving this time, and discovered that we decided to venture out at one of the worst times of the day...rush hour. That can make you a little nervous but most people steer clear of the sports car for some reason.
We hadn't been on the interstate long when I noticed a significantly older lady driving a Kia van passing us and to keep our status as "cool", admonished my friend to speed it up. (no offense towards those who drive Kia's or vans, but when your in a sports car doing 45-50 mph on the interstate?!....I think you get my drift)

I drove home and the top was off the car so my hair was, shall we say, wind-blown (which is just a nice word for "nasty rat's nest) and my hands frozen so that I could barely shift. But who cares!!! We were in a Viper!!!

*note*

I wouldn't suggest taking such a car to an outlet mall for a quick shopping excursion, finding a toy store that's going out of business and buying up large plastic toys. The trunk is nothing to talk about and what started as a short trip to the mall ended in a "where are we going to put all this stuff", now I'm riding with plastic buckets and shovels in my lap.